A play of one.

You wake up one morning;

to find the perfect little happy bubble you live in is now leaking.

You peer out that tiny hole;

only to find a world new world foreign to you.

How oblivious can one be?

The world revolves around the sun,

..most certainly not you.

So much pain,

So much truth hidden behind make.believe happiness.

They are many,

you are one.

It is definitely easier,

to retreat back to the (leaking) bubble and your play of one.

Oswald Chambers said;

"Launch out in reckless belief that the Redemption is complete, and then bother no more about yourself, but begin to do as Jesus Christ said - pray for a the friend who comes to you at midnight, pray for the saints, pray for all men. Pray on the realization that you are only perfect in Christ Jesus, not on this plea. - O Lord, I have done my best, please hear me."

Oh Father,

Help me serve others,

with a joyful heart no less than willing.

Journey with me,

as i launch out and care less about me.

Teach me patience,

to love the many.

This time, i knew.

I just wrote a two page narrating the dream of you. Yet, i'm still afraid its going to fade away any second.

This time, it was clearly you. I was sitting on your lap, all i did was hug you tight. I asked you questions, morbid ones as we both seemed to know. I knew you were going away again, just wasn't sure when. You looked at peace, and were still giving me your words of wisdom on death.

..I even asked you if you were excited to go home (i told you it was morbid). I asked if you could smile down on us from time to time, but it was a negatory - i wonder why, i'll find out for myself soon enough.

I couldn't remember if i said I Love You enough (or at all) while hugging you. I really wish i did. Even in my dreams, i was so afraid of the time you were going home ..again. It wasn't you this time, it was me. Waking up took you back home again.

It was Cia's 24th yesterday, and it felt like such a different day. Our first birthdays without you are coming up. Maybe that's what's making me all jittery.

I love you so much daddy.

Snowed in, :)

I don't hate you but i wish you didn't have to come by so often, Mondays.

I did what Calvin would do, build a (single) mini snowman army :D

It was such a beautiful sight to wake up to this morning!

You constantly amaze me.

Today, is the day i decide to learn to love You so much once again.

..Show me how to love like You have loved me.

And for the 29th time, Blessed Birthday favorite one ♥

I pray that you continue to grow into a man after God's own heart!

Remember, Psalm 55:22.

Cast your burden on the LORD,

and He shall sustain you;

He shall never permit the righteous to be moved.

PS. When you find yourself listening to this over and over again, you know you're missing home more than quite abit!

A hole, too hard to fill.

I way more than love you,

it breaks my heart.

:'(

I'm going to have to learn to keep breathing with a hole in my heart.

Ready, or not.

Spring is here.

and I'll have to brace myself and survive it.

It's about an equal mixture of nervousness and excitement.

I do look forward to an amazing Spring semester and to end my first year with a glorious note :D

Also, knowing that students truly enjoyed your lecture and you being their TA,

never fails to brighten your day.

To many more bright&shiny days, cheerio!

Note to self: Do stay sane, Oh and do try to eliminate procrastination. *wink.

get.your.ducks.in.a.row.pronto!